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Christmas Jokes

Posted: Fri Dec 05, 2008 12:02 am
by Mayhem
What do monkeys sing at Christmas ?
Jungle Bells, Jungle bells.. !
Why are Christmas trees like bad knitters ?
They both drop their needles !
What's Christmas called in England ?
Yule Britannia !
What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas ?
Thanks, I'll never part with it !
Why is a burning candle like being thirsty ?
Beacause a little water ends both of them !
What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas tree ?
A pineapple !
What do you give a train driver for Christmas ?
Platform shoes !
What did the big candle say to the little candle ?
I'm going out tonight !
Whats happens to you at Christmas ?
Yule be happy !
How long does it take to burn a candle down ?
About a wick !

Re: Christmas Jokes

Posted: Fri Dec 05, 2008 4:16 pm
by iSanta
They're all funny XMAS jokes! Thanks for posting and sharing with some of us here! ;) :lol:


BTW, how do you know that Santa Claus was using the tooth brush?


The answer is it smells like a chocolate chip cookie! :lol:

Re: Christmas Jokes

Posted: Wed Feb 03, 2010 11:51 pm
by basujanha2610
Mayhem wrote:What do monkeys sing at Christmas ?
Jungle Bells, Jungle bells.. !
Why are Christmas trees like bad knitters ?
They both drop their needles !
What's Christmas called in England ?
Yule Britannia !
What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas ?
Thanks, I'll never part with it !
Why is a burning candle like being thirsty ?
Beacause a little water ends both of them !
What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas tree ?
A pineapple !
What do you give a train driver for Christmas ?
Platform shoes !
What did the big candle say to the little candle ?
I'm going out tonight !
Whats happens to you at Christmas ?
Yule be happy !
How long does it take to burn a candle down ?
About a wick !

Nice work.......... :shock: :shock: :shock:
_________________________________
thank you

Re: Christmas Jokes

Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2010 2:19 am
by rtuhgdrtt3333333
great!!hoho :D :D

Re: Christmas Jokes

Posted: Tue Oct 19, 2010 10:00 pm
by denver8
Great one liners :D ! Im gonna use them this season to amuse my nephews and neices. Yay!

Re: Christmas Jokes

Posted: Thu Oct 28, 2010 5:15 pm
by Frothy
This really got me ROTFL!!!

Re: Christmas Jokes

Posted: Tue Nov 30, 2010 10:03 am
by iSanta
Why does Santa have his own three gardens?

So, he can ho-ho-ho! :lol:

Re: Christmas Jokes

Posted: Thu Dec 18, 2014 9:02 am
by Sofarris
Ha, they're great. I'm going to use them on my kids :D
Thanks.

Re: Christmas Jokes

Posted: Fri Dec 26, 2014 3:21 am
by CharlesLoyd
iSanta wrote:They're all funny XMAS jokes! Thanks for posting and sharing with some of us here! ;) :lol:


BTW, how do you know that Santa Claus was using the tooth brush?


The answer is it smells like a chocolate chip cookie! :lol:
All jokes are funny, it refreshed me after Christmas, I don't want to let that Christmas time goes :(

Re: Christmas Jokes

Posted: Fri Aug 17, 2018 1:51 pm
by I.Love.Snowman
Santa's Funny Outfit

How do you know Santa Claus has to be a man?
No woman is going to wear the same outfit year after year!

Re: Christmas Jokes

Posted: Sat Aug 18, 2018 3:58 am
by angelpugs2
Lol,too cute.Love some of those christmas jokes. :lol:

Re: Christmas Jokes

Posted: Wed Aug 29, 2018 10:49 am
by I.Love.Snowman
What do you call a kid who doesn't believe in Santa?


A rebel without a Claus

Re: Christmas Jokes

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2018 12:53 pm
by I.Love.Snowman
Why is Christmas just like your job?

You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.