Christmas Jokes

Mayhem · Post by **Mayhem** » Fri Dec 05, 2008 12:02 am

What do monkeys sing at Christmas ?
Jungle Bells, Jungle bells.. !
Why are Christmas trees like bad knitters ?
They both drop their needles !
What's Christmas called in England ?
Yule Britannia !
What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas ?
Thanks, I'll never part with it !
Why is a burning candle like being thirsty ?
Beacause a little water ends both of them !
What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas tree ?
A pineapple !
What do you give a train driver for Christmas ?
Platform shoes !
What did the big candle say to the little candle ?
I'm going out tonight !
Whats happens to you at Christmas ?
Yule be happy !
How long does it take to burn a candle down ?
About a wick !

iSanta · Post by **iSanta** » Fri Dec 05, 2008 4:16 pm

They're all funny XMAS jokes! Thanks for posting and sharing with some of us here!

BTW, how do you know that Santa Claus was using the tooth brush?

The answer is it smells like a chocolate chip cookie!

basujanha2610 · Post by **basujanha2610** » Wed Feb 03, 2010 11:51 pm

Mayhem wrote:What do monkeys sing at Christmas ?
Jungle Bells, Jungle bells.. !
Why are Christmas trees like bad knitters ?
They both drop their needles !
What's Christmas called in England ?
Yule Britannia !
What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas ?
Thanks, I'll never part with it !
Why is a burning candle like being thirsty ?
Beacause a little water ends both of them !
What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas tree ?
A pineapple !
What do you give a train driver for Christmas ?
Platform shoes !
What did the big candle say to the little candle ?
I'm going out tonight !
Whats happens to you at Christmas ?
Yule be happy !
How long does it take to burn a candle down ?
About a wick !

Nice work..........

_________________________________
thank you

rtuhgdrtt3333333 · Post by **rtuhgdrtt3333333** » Sun Mar 14, 2010 2:19 am

great!!hoho

denver8 · Post by **denver8** » Tue Oct 19, 2010 10:00 pm

Great one liners

! Im gonna use them this season to amuse my nephews and neices. Yay!

Frothy · Post by **Frothy** » Thu Oct 28, 2010 5:15 pm

This really got me ROTFL!!!

iSanta · Post by **iSanta** » Tue Nov 30, 2010 10:03 am

Why does Santa have his own three gardens?

So, he can ho-ho-ho!

Sofarris · Post by **Sofarris** » Thu Dec 18, 2014 9:02 am

Ha, they're great. I'm going to use them on my kids

Thanks.

CharlesLoyd · Post by **CharlesLoyd** » Fri Dec 26, 2014 3:21 am

iSanta wrote:They're all funny XMAS jokes! Thanks for posting and sharing with some of us here!

BTW, how do you know that Santa Claus was using the tooth brush?

The answer is it smells like a chocolate chip cookie!

All jokes are funny, it refreshed me after Christmas, I don't want to let that Christmas time goes

I.Love.Snowman · Post by **I.Love.Snowman** » Fri Aug 17, 2018 1:51 pm

Santa's Funny Outfit

How do you know Santa Claus has to be a man?
No woman is going to wear the same outfit year after year!

angelpugs2 · Post by **angelpugs2** » Sat Aug 18, 2018 3:58 am

Lol,too cute.Love some of those christmas jokes.

I.Love.Snowman · Post by **I.Love.Snowman** » Wed Aug 29, 2018 10:49 am

What do you call a kid who doesn't believe in Santa?

A rebel without a Claus

I.Love.Snowman · Post by **I.Love.Snowman** » Tue Sep 04, 2018 12:53 pm

Why is Christmas just like your job?

You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

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